SAD NEWS: By filing for divorce, she has completely embarrassed the Lionesses, the head coach.

SAD NEWS: By filing for divorce, she has completely embarrassed the Lionesses, the head coach.

My spouse informed me that he had moved on and was divorcing me while we were watching Holby City. “Does that mean you are going to leave our one and three-year-old too?” Startled, I inquired. What he said in return escapes me. It felt like the end of the world and came as a sudden bolt. I can still picture myself curled up in a fetal posture on the ground, wondering, “What do I do?”

After then, everything was a bit of a fog, but I do recall walking to my neighbor’s house to inform her of what had occurred. I informed her, “He can’t go if I’m not there.” When I returned home, my husband was waiting for me at the door with a packed bag, ready to go. My neighbor had called my parents to let them know what was happening. My brother came to sit with me a few hours later, in the wee hours of the morning, when my parents summoned him.

I went through a rollercoaster of emotions over the next few days, weeks, and months, including rage, anxiety, hurt, confusion, panic, disbelief, and grief. I was feeling overpowered and had no idea how I would handle it. During those initial weeks, finishing ten minutes without crying seemed like a significant accomplishment.

In six weeks, I shed two stone, stopped sleeping, and experienced mood swings. It was among the hardest and most demanding experiences I have ever had.

I was ignorant of the divorce process and, maybe naively, believed that I would never experience one.James and I had been together for 14 years, having met in college. My friends had never divorced, my parents were still together, and at 35, I considered myself to be in a solid, happy marriage.

Looking back, I doubt that I would have recognized anything was amiss because I was so preoccupied with managing my two tiny children and my job on a daily basis. At the time, I didn’t think my marriage needed any work.

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